Beacon of Hope

  From Stress...To Relief
  There are times when my husband's thoughts and behavior send a chill of panic through me. Times when he isn't sleeping well and he seems especially talkative or excited, and especially when his thinking doesn't square with reality and he is believing his delusions. Although I have learned that, with my husband, this is often a fleeting experience and there is no need to panic, my internal alarm system still goes off. There are some things that I have learned to do to help reduce the stress I feel at these times.

Taking The Edge Off
The first thing that helps me is being aware of the physical symptoms of my anxiety - my pounding heart, the tension I feel in my neck, my clenched jaw - and reducing them. The quickest way for me to do this is by taking deep breaths through my nose, holding them, and slowly letting them out my mouth. Decreasing the physical signs of anxiety really takes the takes the edge off my panic. If my tension lingers I try other things to relax. To help relieve the tension in my neck, I heat up a microwaveable wrap and hold it on the back of my neck to relax my muscles. Sometimes I go to a quiet place and take a nap, at other times I go for a walk. A hot bubble bath is one of my favorite stress relievers. These all help my physical reactions. Ask for help if you need some space and you don't have the luxury of taking it yourself.

Getting Focused
The next thing I do is to focus my thinking and try not over-react to the situation. I find it helpful to use the cognitive therapy techniques and ideas I have learned to help keep me focused. I know that distorted thinking plays a large role in producing anxiety for me. I start blowing things out of proportion by anticipating that the situation will end up in a crisis or hospitalization. When I can identify my feelings and distortions, I am able to combat them with a more rational response. I can realize that my husband's delusional thinking has happened before and not ended up in a crisis. Many times when his stress is relieved his distorted thinking subsides. I can also realize that there are steps that can be taken if it seems like he is headed for a relapse, like contacting his doctor to possibly change his medication or helping to decrease his stress level by reducing his exposure to stimulation. Realizing this helps reduce my anxiety.

Gaining Perspective
Other things that help me are journaling, prayer and meditation. All of these help me to sort out my feelings and my situation and gain some perspective. Some of my favorite Bible verses for dealing with anxiety are Philippians 4 and Matthew 6:25-34. Isaiah chapters 40-44 help me to realize I am not in this situation alone and that I have a God who loves me, is concerned with my welfare, and is ultimately in control.

There are times when these things help and other times when I find it extremely difficult to have peace and calm, but even these difficult times usually ease up. When they linger on and don't seem to let up, I know it is time to get some outside help.

Here are some helpful links on reducing stress:

How To Reduce Stress
Stress Management
Stress Resources

Nutrition and Stress
Nutrition and Stress

Breathing
Breathing
Breathing For Stress Relief
 
Beacon of Hope